March 25, 2011

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In

1-What is your must have gadget?
Normally I would say my phone....but since I have become a is now the Itzbeen! This thing is amazing, and I can't live without it. It helps me stay sane, and reminds me when I forget. Here is a pic of it, and you can buy it at Baby Earth ....They even give Military discount.

2-How does your adulthood compare to what you imagined it would be like when you were a little kid?
Ha Ha Ha I laughed out loud when I read this! Adulthood is nothing like I had imagined. I had figured I would be able to be free of everything. The reality is I am more tied down now than I was as a teen. lol Granted I can do what I want, but I have to be responsible, and I need money to do the things I want. It is a lot more responsibility than I thought it would be when I was a kid. But when I look at my son seems so worth it.

3-What is your favorite chocolate recipe?
Plain ole Chocolate Cake with Chocolate icing, and some mint ice cream mixed in. Yah I stir my cake and ice cream together....I don't think you can eat it any other way. lol

4-How do you deal with military life when it gets to be to much or to hard? submitted by Combat Boots And Pointe Shoes
Hey look it's my question!! This will be fun to see what other people will put as answers. Well having gone through 4 deployments to Iraq, 1 to Uganda, and 1 to Norway I feel a little seasoned with the routine. But sometimes it does get to be to much. The thing I have to remind myself is...Yes this stinks, yes I am lonely, and yes I want to throw a temper tantrum. But I have to wonder how my husband is doing. He can't whine about it, he can't complain about being lonely, and he for sure cannot throw a temper tantrum. lol I let myself cry, I take a day off from my normal routine of cleaning, work, or whatever it is....and I cry some more, take myself out on a hot date of dinner and a movie, and I allow myself to get chip faced...with Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream. And on occasion I do some retail therapy. I take care of my plants and make sure I haven't killed them off, and I try to take my mind off of life in general. I don't want to be surrounded by people who remind me of I pamper myself alone. I chose my own company to find something to soothe the soul and get myself back on track so I can get back into my routine.
One thing wives need to remember is that women run with higher emotions than men most of the time. So even though I know my husband has it worse, and I am not in danger like me may be.....I am allowed to feel emotion, and cry about it. But for the sake of my family and marriage....I cannot sit in my own sad feelings for more than a day.

5-What piece of advice would you give a new Military spouse facing their first deployment?
It is going to be tough, it is going to be lonely, and you are going to question your sanity. But you have to be the rock at home. Even when you don't want to be. You can't complain about every little stinkin thing to your spouse. They need to be able to vent to you, but you cannot use them like you normally do to vent. Tell them about big things, and how you are going to fix or deal with them. Your spouse needs to feel that you are able to somewhat function while they are away. If not.....they are constantly worrying about you and are not concentrating on the mission at hand or what they are doing at the moment. You have resources to help you deal with he emotional part of a deployment. Your spouse has only 3. His friend by his side...if he has one, the Chaplain, and YOU! You have several, and it is unfair to offload petty things onto your spouse while they are gone. You will survive while they are gone. But keep things realistic. You will have hard days, you more than likely will cry. And you will for sure be lonely. But there are ways to help with that. Other spouses know what you are going through. Befriend a few. Also if you are lonely....surround yourself with people. Get a job, volunteer, or just do some damage with retail therapy. It does not do you, your spouse, or your marriage any good to isolate yourself from the world while they are away. Allow yourself to feel bad or down once in a while when they are away, but don't let it last more than a day, two at the most. You have to be strong and brave. If you let it drag you down.....then things will fall apart. You have to suck it up and be brave just like your spouse. ;0)

XoXo-Andrea Carla

1 comment:

  1. I'll have to look into the Itzbeen in the future :-) I stumbled here through one of those Friday Fill-in's, and I just love the theme of your blog!
    Have a great weekend :-)